Blow Me A Kiss And I Shall Be Yours Forever

this is me being so tired, after a long day in class..
this is my two little darling ducks..


I feel damn stress lo.. shit man.. my class everyday like from 7 am - 4 pm.. then come back got 50 questions of anatomy and physiology to do.. then 2ml got class gain and handing up of work.. i feel damn terrible la.. shit... shit.. shit... oh yea.. i bought 2 ducks and 2 hamsters.. haha... to entertain myself and to release my stress by playing with them.. cute ppl.. oh here r my ospek indon's pic as well la..this is kw's stupid face.. to make me happy cos lately we r alwiz arguing.. hoprefully he doesnt get angry for putting up that pic..

we were at alex yeo's new honda car..taking photo like some mad ppl.. well i guess cos we seldom meet.. im in indon, nimi's in aust, alex going to aust as well but diff place.. well anywayzz... i miss them now.. very much!!

can for once he stop hurting me and put me in first place N not that stupid fucking psp of his.. he is one man or boy who cant keep to his words.. i hate it when he does things like this to me... yday i was sobbing quietly in bed for nearly an hour b4 he actually notice that i am crying.. WELL BEST OF ALL, he din even CONSOLE me.. wow.. what a BF.. well to think bout it makes me rethink whether he reli cares or he just using me when he thinks he is lonely.. i reli hate it...

now to think bout it, i wish i din end up in this fucked up rship.. now i just wan out.. i am considering it.. ppl think he is such a sweet guy.. caring and all.. but if u stay with him long enuf, u'll know his true colors.. he dun gif a shit bout u.. all he wants is a tempo love affair and then wa la.. he begins to treat u like shit, make u think like shit.. made u FEEL like shit!!!!

Ospek Indonesia UniBRAW 2008

wow.. tiresome..u hv no idea what kinda stress we go thru attending this ospek.. i mean.. the sleep we get is like.. so little.. the works we have to mark is like alot.. and the attendance taking is all bullshit..well who would wanna come like 5 am in the morning to listen to the stupid briefing.. and pls la.. we're malaysian.. u think we gif a shit bout whats happening to new MABA..(mahasiswa baru)??

secondly, we are onli panitia kerohanian.. agama budha so we dun reli gif a shit on how bad the dicipline,whats going on with the MABA, what difficulty our PK2MABA is facing and bla bla.. we r onli here to handle the time when ibadah.. so gif us a break la.. they look at us like we r not doing our job but hey... we din ask for this job! we din ask to be the panitia.. we were basicaly forced into doing it cos they din have anyone to take up our place.. so yea.. thats plain selfish actually.. we dun point fingers at us.. cos hey.. we're innocent.. like kambing korban... meeimeei's parents r here and vijay is back in msia so the onli two idiots to take up this job is me and aaron.. can u imagine, 5 am til 7 pm we have to b here? and plus the sesi ibadah is like onli from 8-8.25am, 12-1pm then 3.05-3-30pm.. and thats it... so what do we do in betw?? ntg!!! and they wont let us leave uni... muz ask izin and all.. luckily our ketua kerohanian mas hafid pd '06 is a freakingly nice fella so yea.. he let us leave without permission... that was one thing cool bout being panitia of kerohanian.. we basically do NOTHING! oh yea.. other than that, we have sharan who takes care of the sikh.. to help us sign too or we get screwed.. we kinda like help each other cos he himself sometimes skip.. yea.. so basically.. we cabut once sesi agama ibadah is finished..

oh yea.. the new batch 2008 malaysians are one cocked up ppl... they think they r so smart that they do not need US seniors to help them.. they disrespected us, looked down upon us and even questioned our results and behaviors.. i mean pls la... we r like what... ur direct seniors.. ur onli seniors who have every books, notes and slides that is related to them cos since there were changes in the syllabus, so we basically r their onli sources and stil.. they treat us like shit... not all of them.. but most of them...

i mean yr by yr, each batch gets worse.. our direct seniors tot we were worse, they have no idea, that our juniors r even worse.. they r manja, spoilt, selfish and cocky.. and pls la.. we r the minority in indon. so we kinda like stick to helping each other out, cos who would help u if u needed help? us.. msians!! and they on the other hand think they can handle themselves so be it then... fucked up losers...

ok then. i am going to go now and help out our 'juniors' so yes... this is all i am gonna say.. oh yea.. another thing, there is onli 3 juniors whom i think is worth our troubles.. well one is an indonesian who lived in msia for 17 yrs.. named nico.. and other is navkiran bro kirandip lastly a malay gurl who is bit.. ok la.. not just a bit on the plump side.. tall though... dunno her name.. nvm la... anyway they r very very humble, respectful, nice ppl.. so yea.. these r the onli ppl whom i think will survive here and the rest is going into the shit hole.. and yes.. im repeating it.. SHIT HOLE!

anyway, i will post my ospek picture later on la... tata....

i regretted selling off my psp to my own bf..now he puts it as first b4 me.. sometimes when i tell him to put it away when im around.. he'll get angry and slam the door, making me wondering if it was my fault for getting irritated with his rude and ignorant behavior towards me or zit his fault for being hardcore on psp..

i wish someone would tell me what to do.. he makes me so angry i feel like walking out.. walking out of this hse, this rship.. i know it is too much for just a psp but u have to ustand, if he can make psp more worthwhile than me then what bout other things in life later on.. will he do the same?

love can be blind.. but i do not want to make that mistake gain.. after what happened a year ago..i dun wanna get so blinded by love and throw everything i have worked hard to get and work hard to gain just bcos of it.. at that crucial time, onli my parents and sisters were there for me 24/7..

if u ask me again, now at this moment who do i place most value in my heart, that would be my family.. not my lover(s)..can aaron ustand why i scolded him.. why im so unhappy.. the day b4 yday, i walked out of the hse after a huge fight with him due to that fucking psp.. and guess what.. he dint even care.. he din apologize for his wrong and can even turn the table around.. now he is doing it gain...damn.. im frustrated.. im upset.. what can i do..

bii.. wish ur here..wish u know my dilemma.. my problem.. my heartache.. why do i keep facing probs with him and not u.. is this a sign.. for u.. for us.. i do not know.. why do i have to come back for penmas.. now with so much probs here, i just wanna go back to msia.. the comfort zone.. i hate it here.. in indonesia.. i hate being around weird ppls, weird environment, a reli not ustanding bf.. i just wish im home, with my family.. and u bii.. ur the best thing that eva happened to me.. ur the closest fren a gurl can eva have.. u ustand me, u pamper me, u care for me, u will alwiz b there when i need you.. why cant aaron be more like u..

forget it, this is life.. we'll nv get the things we reli wan, can we?

It was daddy's 50th bday bash held on the 7th of august.. bcos i was leaving on thr 8th so dad had it earlier.. we had so much fun... drinking, socializing and meeting daddy's closest frens and relatives.. it was like my be-early bday bash as well... haha...

me, kalai, hrishi, and indon fren and also navin's gf putri.. we were being dokter kecil in the primary skol..
me near the beautiful site at desa.. it was magnificent.. luckily sharan brought me here.. if not, i would have missed the chance to see this place.. but to climb back up was tough cos it was a slunt hill..gosh..tiresome..
this is my ibu during the stay at the desa for community service.. she is like so nice.. provided us reli good food and good snacks like ground nuts and green apple which she grew herself and keropok and all...
sharan poser.. haha..we were near the river bank d...
this is my family members.. these r the gurls whom i squeezed in the room with.. and on that pathetic bed.. haha... but they r reli nice ppl.. im the onli msian in that hse.. haha.. but it was ok.. no language barrier.. luckily my ibu din speak bhs jawa to me...keke
this is like the toilet where it was like behind my hse which i was staying for 3 days in penmas (community service).. it looks bad eh? imagine me.. ylaine liow.. so so damn city kinda gurl living in such a shit hole.. damn...u wouldnt know how much i suffered!!
this is like outside my hse.. and yes... the hses in desa was pretty much the same as this one....or maybe worst!!!
closer loook at my toilet where i fell.... i fell like after that barrel there... the grey one?? yes!! they din have any lights outside except that reli reli dim light in the toilet... we have attached bathroom.. and this desa ppl have detached bathroom.. damn...
this is the SD (sekolah dasar) where we trained the desa kids...
these r the 'adoravle' kids of SD.. and yes.. thats me holding the tooth brush.. im teaching them the right way to brush their teeth.. hahaa
i was at community service on the 9th of august-11th of august, that was the reason why i went back early.. well.. the desa was reli reli cool.. i mean the condition of the place wasnt that welcoming but then ppl there were frenly and we reli had a blast!! i had the chance to teach children how to brush their teeth, go on 'gerak jalan' as in healthy walks, being dokcil (dokter kecil), had the opportunity to make help take down patients' complaints and take their blood pressure, my darling aaron had the chance to participate in the circumcision surgery and help inject a sick patient.. anyway the things we experienced there were so much different and eventhough the condition we were living in wasnt that great like in the sense that i have to squeeze myself with 5 other girls and then my toilet was outside the hse and the most embarrassing part was i slipped and fell while walking thru the dark slippery pathway to the toilet.. so embarrassing...!!!!, anyway we had fun and i even went to the river.. sharan brought me there.. it had such beautiful scenery...my god...
this was the path to the SD (sekolah dasar) for the primary school students.. they were 7 but then they looked like 5 to me.. there was this gurl who happened to be my ibu rumah's daughter... well.. she looked like 6 to me but the fact is she's 10!!! even my sister pauline look much much older...
jarret (my classmate) is like looking out at the panitia who is sitting over there registrating students or whoeva is participating in the gerak jalan..
these r my hse mate, we're staying in the same hse at the desa.. her name's rizki and she's from the gizi (pharmacy faculty) and damn.. she is nice.... when i went back late, she smsed me and asked bout my where about and even asked if i was alrit.. i mean the indonesians reli looked out for you... i reli reli was touched...

me.. wearing my jas lab... well i look horrible cos i hadnt had a good night sleep crampin myself with so many other gurls on one reli reli miserable looking twin size bed.. and plus i took cold ice water shower at 5 in the morning for the past 3 days there cos i had tugas!! damn!!! i din brought my soap, shampoo, none!!n so i just took cold shower and wore my clothes on!! i know i know.. dirty rit.. no choice.. keke... so yea.. basically i look horrid..

my aunt wendy and her family... at pasta maniac resto.. near bugis..
this is a reli unique bar called clinic.. damn.. they serve in a blood bag...
my dearest was a bit tipsy after just one glass of beer.. what a loser....haha
standing there.. blur blur d i think.. at clark quay..
damn.. is that my bra strip coming down.. haha...
korean bbq at tampines mall.. KW trying to decide what to eat..
me being so choosy... over food...
that looks delicious rit..
me somewhr around city hall shopping complex..if not ,mistaken, its called suntec..
Kw N muah at the boat quay..

tony roma's onion rings..
tony roma's chicken platter..
tony roma's pasta..
tony roma's cheessy burger..
andy, me and little amanda..
this is andy's niece: amanda, isnt she adorable? wish she was my own.. haha
Andy bought this for me for my 20th bday.. if u notice, the alphabet 'y' is diff from the rest..



i am so lucky to have such a good fren... my new bff... im dedicating this post to you andy.. thank you for spending ur precious time with me.. u have been such a dear to me.. nv will i have another guy fren like you...

thank you for all the dinner treats and that lovely gift.. and for introducing me to ur family members.. haha... i had a great time... hope we will do it gain when im back from indon..